When a friend hurts you, it really hurts. I think even more so because it is unexpected - it feels like the person who was supposed to have your back covered, stabbed you in the back. It makes you want to build 8 feet high walls around your heart and life, never trusting again and most defintely never being vulnerable again. You feel betrayed, sold out, like damaged goods, not good enough. Madame Dorothée Deluzy (a French actress from the 18th Century) said: "It is easier to forgive an enemy than a friend." I can understand it. A friend knew you. A friend should be trusted. You should be safe.
I can quote lots of people, like Oscar Wilde (fellow Irishman ;-)) who said: "Always forgive your enemies--nothing annoys them so much." Or Gandhi, or Alexander Pope, but we always have to get back to what Jesus said.
The bottomline is Jesus taught us to pray, "forgive us as we forgive those who trespass against us". You have to forgive. I have to forgive.
What is forgiveness? I think it starts by saying "I am sorry" (and mean it). I think it is trusting God to bring healing to your emotions and that of the other party. I think it is not drawing sharp breaths on receipt of emails, wondering what the agenda is this time. I think it is letting go. I think it is a process.
What do you think?
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